Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Each Moment

I am continually humbled by how God is using my teenagers to teach me more about what it means to live for Christ. Many a late night conversation which started as frustrated tears has ended with....

How will I know which is the best way for me to go?

Why do I keep making the same mistakes over and over again? No matter how hard I try I'm always back where I started.

Where do I fit? What am I good at? What makes me different?

I need my life to count for something- something outside of myself.

I want to do something important with my life.

I have struggled with these same questions and had to learn again and again that life is not about the destination. It's about the journey to get there. The shaping of one's character happens in the dailiness of life. The constant rhythms. The ebbs and flows. The unplanned detours. The subtle interactions. Relationships. Regrets. Lessons learned.

This week one of my daughter's classmates was tucked in bed for the night with the flu and went to be with her Lord for eternity.

This has spent my mom mind spinning in a million different directions. Much of my striving as a parent is to get my children to a certain point academically, socially, spiritually. A destination. It seems at times as though the clock is ticking faster and faster....

I'm convicted this night by my own words. Life is about the journey not the destination.

Were my words today kind and encouraging?

Does she know there is NOTHING she has to do to earn my love?

Did I look up and look into his eyes when he wanted to show me latest drawing?

Was I approachable or too busy to give affection freely?

Did I give my children the Truth today?

Tonight I'm thankful for another day in the life of my children. The privilege to walk beside them and be their mom is one that I never want to take for granted.


Angie said...

Oh Monica - I feel your pain - and Emma is just 2! I can't imagine the many tearful talks we will have...and the worries I will face about whether or not I am getting any of it right.

My heart broke knowing that a child had passed away...from the flu. A teacher at our school lost her 14 year old daughter almost 3 years ago from the flu (and other bugs). Praying for that family.

Praying for you...

Tisha said...

Wow, I hadn't heard that story yet. How sad! You truly never know what tomorrow holds...

Mary@notbefore7 said...

In tears...wonderful reminder. Thank you.

LOVE the homeschool tour...hmmm.... :)