Thursday, January 15, 2009

When Mom Can't Fix It

I had one of those moments tonight, one of those moments when I'm humbled as a mom. I was sitting in the doctor's office at 7pm and watching my daughter's face turn red with tears streaming down the minute the doctor shut the door.

"Why does this always have to happen? I just want to feel well," she sobbed.

"I don't know, sweetie," was all I could reply choking back the tears. I just don't know.

For the past few winters she's suffered with recurring ear infections. These infections often require more than one round of antibiotics which is brutal on the digestive tract. Once the infection is cleared up then the other ear will begin it's course. It starts with the popping and then a day when everything is quiet and then very loud. Next comes the pain and then the diagnosis. And here we go again.

I honestly can't say how long this has been going on since she only began expressing this problem three years ago. Looking back at some behavior patterns and frustrations at home I figure it's been going on for many years. It's been a set back.

She's been to two doctors and a specialist all who claim that she tests normal and there seems to be no underlying cause for these infections. Last winter we were to the point where there were no more medications to try. I really don't know what next step we were going to take. Thankfully that last medication did the job.

I want to fix this yet I know that not I nor medications ever truly can. God is her Creator and her Healer. He is her Sustainer and her Friend. I pray that she will have relief from these infections once and for all. But more than that, I pray that she will know more of the Lord and His ever present Help in the midst of her suffering.

I'm thinking tonight of all of those mothers who are tucking in a child whose life is wrecked with cancer, hunger, disease or disability. What we "suffer" does not even compare. Yet in the midst of all of this, we moms have a perfect Shepherd. May God be glorified through it all.

He tends his flock like a shepherd:
He gathers the lambs in his arms
and carries them close to his heart;
he gently leads those that have young.
- Isaiah 40:11


Heather L. said...

I'm sorry. That is hard and frustrating and sad. I hope she feels better soon and that God sees fit to allow the infections to stop.

Jenny B said...

That is so rough. Tell her I am praying for her. It is so frustrating to not feel well, but it is usually in those times that we cry out to God and draw closer to Him. I love you sweet girl.

Michelle said...

Have you tried a pediatric ENT? With Parker, we went to Doctor Hamaker and really LOVED her. Praying that she feels better soon!

Monica said...

My oldest had lots of ear/throat infections as a baby. We had his tonsils removed and he has done well ever since.
I know how you're feeling. It is so hard when they are sick and suffering.
Thank you for the encouraging comment today! Boy, do I ever know about hitting the ground running. Most days my head nearly spins and I feel dizzy, trying ot answer everyone's questions! There are so many things to juggle. I kind of struggled with that post, because there is such a balancing act between order and staying connected with each child and their needs. I just want to be real with those types of posts, ya know?

Amy K said...

I'm sorry to hear about this! That's the hardest thing about being a mom, I think, watching your children in pain. I pray the doctors can find a way to help her.

mindi said...

I'm so sorry - ear infections are terribly rough. Even with tubes Lex still gets them, but thankfully they are fixed with ear drops!
I'll keep her in my prayers.