Friday, May 15, 2009

I resemble that remark

I've been known to say that natural childbirth is useful in the sense that it completely changes one's reference for pain. "It prepares you for motherhood. After that you can slam your hand in the car door and just walk away thinking, 'Well at least it's not as painful as giving birth.'"

I'd now like to reascend that comment, because as of today I can testify that shutting one's own finger in the door is in fact MORE painful than childbirth. And now here's a little story:

I had a coupon (naturally) that needed to be used for haircuts so I took the three youngest to Great Clips. Our usual lady was there and made John as cute as ever. The unusual lady was there and did not listen well (or chose to ignore) my instructions for dear Joseph. "Use #4 clippers on the back. Scissor cut the front to be shaggy. Long sideburns, please. We do not want to see his scalp."

Well, let's just say she got a little crazy. Maybe she made a mistake with the clippers and used the rest of his hair to cover it up. I don't know, but he ended up with a Lego hair cut. He, too, is as cute as ever, but he does resemble a Lego man.

(I'll add a picture here tomorrow. He's sleeping right now.)

Getting back into the van, I was pondering his hair and whether that really is what a $6.99 haircut looks like, when I shut the door with all my might on my right thumb. My response to this pain was one of flight (not fight) and I pulled my thumb out of the closed door. SERIOUSLY, I have never been in so much pain. The nail immediately turned purple. I drove home with my thumb stuck in my Diet Coke while moaning loudly.

Of course, I had Joseph there to encourage me. "Mom, do what you tell us to do. Just relax, Mom. Breathe. Think about something happy, Mom. Try not to think about it. Are you breathing, Mom?...."

We were to leave for our weekend trip in an hour and I was sure that my thumb was broken. The pain would not let up. By God's grace, I found a hand doctor that agreed to see me as a walk in as his last appointment of the day. Why go to the ER for a three hour $800 visit/Xray, when I knew they were just going to send me to see the ortho doctor who wouldn't be in until Monday?

The xray showed a small chip which will cause some discomfort, but no casting was required. He said the major pain will come from the nail which may or may not fall off. I kind of which it would fall off right now to relive some of this pressure. I can sit here and count my heart rate.

So with only a slight delay we made it to Nashville in good time. Tomorrow looks to be a fun day!


mom24 said...

Ok -I know it's not nice to laugh at someone else's pain. But oh my goodness, I'm crying with laughter.
Maybe you shouldn't have shut the door on your thumb "with all your might" but just a tiny but instead? Oh maybe you'd feel better if you'd have been able to stick it in a Diet Dr. Pepper instead? LOL!
But what sweet children - coaching you through the pain 'til you got home! WHat a blessing that you could get in with the DR too!
It certainly sounds more painful than childbirth. I hope that Motrin takes the edge/throbbing off and you heal quickly and enjoy your trip!

Monica said...

Oh, I can't imagine the pain! I know how we have to close our side van doors to get them closed good, and they are so big and heavy. Wow! I'm glad you're not in a cast, but I'm sorry you're in so much pain. I'll be praying that you can rest and enjoy your trip. And BE MORE CAREFUL ;)
Oh, and soo cute what the kids said!!

Tisha said...

Oh Monica, I am so sorry! You always have such a positive attitude. I really need to be around you more so it'll rub off on me.
Have a wonderful time in Nashville. I love that place!

Catherine said...

I did something similar to a toe the year after Hannah was born and I also thought that was more painful than natural childbirth. How can such a small part of the body cause so much pain??? I'm so sorry about your finger and I hope it gets better soon and that you don't lose your fingernail!

Heather L. said...

How terrible!!! i'm so sorry! i'll have to see this poor thumb tomorrow! I don't think I want to be able to relate....

Saralyn said...


Amy K said...

Ow! Kevin mentioned that he heard this happened. Hopefully it will feel better soon!